A moment and a sign

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These are pictures from my yard, this shows I have sweet peas. Not growing up a proper trellis but put in by happenstance. The last time I grew them I might have been 11. They thrill me. Can you eat the pods that form? 

The red sweet pea-a particular triumph.  

I sat here thinking it was just a view I wish I could share. 

Basil, I’ve got a couple pots of basil and this one is the best, years ago mom made pesto from basil that took off. It was so delish-she was such a good cook.

Just some pictures of my life right now. I’ll look back on them as points in time. Today I had the vent from my dryer to outside professionally cleaned by a young man from Israel.  Very beautiful  fellow. He really noticed my art I’ve done since the separation and betrayal trauma and encouraged me to sell and in New York. That gave me confidence. I’ll put some pictures of my paintings in 2026. I have stalled on painting lately. He felt my work was good. And he showed me pictures from New York and galleries he went to. Took lovely pictures. Loves art. He said he was my sign. On his arm he had a saying about healing from trauma. Basically saying you have to take risks and he said -you only live once. So I knew he was truly a sign in that moment because….

When Jack abruptly left and crashed my life with 40 years of false promises his briefest of statements was given answering-why? On the affair was, you only live once.  Followed by and then you die? Looking at me like utter filth before him. I’ll never unsee that look. It held so much contempt and hate. Utter hate. But the universe was talking in here. Today. Because this young fellow also said that you cannot heal trauma in the place where it was made. I agree with this but I am doing my best to transform and act on my spaces to transform trauma. But if I could I’d take myself back to West Virginia and start over. 

My art. 

I’m fairly happy with the art. 

Just need to continue to try to survive for my kids. And to represent for retired public school teachers. Teachers and women shit on by men who betray their trust. I see you. I am you.  Damaged by those not really capable of creating or teaching anything. But trauma.